While filling in for Jen on The Jennifer Zamparelli Show on RTÉ 2FM, Lottie Ryan spoke with Dudes & Dogs founder, Rob Osman about encouraging men to speak more openly about their mental health.
Founded by Rob Osman in 2019, Dudes and Dogs is a men's wellbeing group and community interest company that encourages men to get out into nature and open up about their mental health.
"We get guys out into the fresh air for a walk and a talk, and we use dogs to facilitate it," explains Osman. "We train, what we call, our 'dog dudes' - they come along, they bring their dog, and we invite any guy to come along for a walk and a talk with us."
"They can talk about the big stuff, the small stuff or anything in between. It's a safe environment for them to talk about anything they want."
As a dog owner himself, Osman came up with the idea when he realised that he was having better communication with his friends when they were out in nature rather than sitting down face to face.
"I realised we were just having far more productive chats when we were going out for dog walks side by side rather than necessarily sitting face to face or sitting in that pub environment."
The 40-year-old told Lottie that he spent much of his life grappling with the idea of masculinity and what society considered 'manly' and 'strong'. As someone who was naturally in touch with his emotions, Osman says that he considered himself to be "weird" and not a "typical man".
Having lost his dad in his early 20s, and as someone who suffered with severe social anxiety, Osman told Lottie that he spent much of his life keeping himself together rather than allowing himself to truly grieve or invest in his mental wellbeing.
"You create coping mechanisms and ways of behaving," he says. "It wasn't until I opened up and started talking about my feelings and emotions that I realised it wasn't weird, I wasn't alone feeling this way, we all have our concerns, we all get scared, we all get worried and we all get down sometimes."
"You talk about it and you share it, it doesn't just help you. It helps the other guys who hear you talking about it and might not be so comfortable doing it."
When he became a father himself, Osman says he found a new appreciation for his emotional intelligence and realised that he wanted to give his son a different understanding of masculinity.
"Masculinity can be a really beautiful thing, it really can. It can be a really strong thing, but it can also become toxic if it's dealt with the wrong way."
"We have all these hang ups about - or we think we do - about what society wants from a man whether that's community, culture, or the way we were brought up. It means we can't be ourselves.
"There's lots of different versions of masculinity," he adds. "Your version is as acceptable as the next one."
So far, Osman says the groups have consisted of "every Tim, Dick and Harry", from young men in their 20s to older men and those who you may not expect to take part, like doormen coming off a night shift.
He reminds listeners that you don't have to be a dog owner to take part, but you're more than welcome to bring your own if you like. The benefit of having the animals around is that, if you're not quite ready to talk, the animals can work as a buffer.
"The dogs, what they give you, is a bit of a break from that pressure. We call it a bit of a 'pressure valve moment', you can talk about the heaviest stuff, the biggest stuff, and then the dog does something stupid and you have a laugh, come out of the moment briefly, but then you can go straight back in."
Dudes and Dogs is based in the UK but is coming to Cork on Jan 30th and Osman says they hope to growing internationally. Click here for more info.
