This morning on The Ryan Tubridy Show, Ryan read out a letter that had been sent to him by a listener who is considering suicide. Listen to the audio above.
The listener wrote that he realised how badly things had deteriorated when he was filling out an application for the annual Darkness Into Light walk, which he had agreed to do with friends.
When asked "Who do you walk for?", he wrote that he walked for himself and when asked why he did so, he wrote: "because I’m struggling now."
"The truth is, I am destroyed by depression and once again find myself considering suicide…I walk out of desperation.
"I walk in the vague hope that maybe something will happen to change the way I feel. "
The listener explained that he is a man in his early 40s "with a beautiful wife and two young children".
Despite this positive part of his life, he is worried that he will die by suicide.
"I will do very well to survive this period of my life…I desperately need someone to help me."
The listener believes he has suffered from depression for a long time but was better able to "put on a brave face" in the past. Ever since a minor setback at work, he hasn’t been able to hide it as well.
The listener went on to describe how it feels to be suicidal:
"The closest I can come is to describe it as excruciating pain.
"Not physical but excruciating nonetheless. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. No escape. No pain relief available…"
"You feel that nothing good applies to you. You see strangers walking down the street and you’re so envious of them because they look like they feel okay."
While he describes the dark temptation of assuming that your loved ones would be better off without you, the listener does believe that something can be done.
"I believe that no-one wants to die by suicide. They just want the pain to go away."
He encouraged anyone who thinks that someone may be depressed or suicidal to offer their help and thinks that those not in the grip of depression can help those that are with their objectivity.
"Don’t be shy. Don’t be embarrassed. Don’t wait and have regrets. Tell them that you are there…Tell them that you are not depressed and you are thinking straight and that you are ready and willing to take control until they get back on your feet.
"Tell them that the cavalry has arrived."
Ryan encouraged the listener to get in touch with the show so he and the team can help him, saying: "You need to go nowhere but into the arms of love".
If you feel you need to talk to somebody, The Samaritans have a helpline which is open 24 hours a day. You can speak to them by calling 116123 or texting 087 260 9090.
