Analysis: Irish research estimates that roughly one in four families in Ireland have a parent who has experienced mental health difficulties
By Suzanne Egan, Niamh Stack and Clara Hoyne, Mary Immaculate College
Being a parent is tough at times. Whether it involves the major life transition and sleep deprivation of caring for a newborn, or supporting a teenager in finding their independence and way in the world, each age and stage and each individual child bring their own unique parenting challenges. These challenges can include bedtimes and sleep routines, mealtimes and food choices, issues with screen time or content, school and homework, peer interactions and bullying. However, research shows that these parenting challenges are even more difficult for parents that have mental health challenges too.
Approximately one in eight people globally are affected by a mental health disorder and Irish research estimates that roughly one in four families in Ireland have a parent who has experienced mental health difficulties. Despite the common prevalence of mental health challenges in parents, many parents struggle alone with their difficulties and feel isolated.
Our new survey of over 200 parents in Ireland with mental health challenges showed that 83% found parenting challenges more difficult, but that 46% did not know where to access parenting supports. Even for parents who do know where to access supports, barriers exist. Some parents felt they could not turn to family as they did not have open enough relationships with them. Many were on long waiting lists for services.
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From RTÉ Radio 1's Drivetime, New research on parental mental health and the impact it has on the children in the household
Others found parenting groups challenging. One person was offered a group session but due to social anxiety could not attend. Another issue noted in relation to group sessions was highlighted by a parent who said 'you can feel judged by parents with less issues in their home'.
Stigma and fear of being judged were some of the biggest barriers to accessing supports, particularly the fear that admitting mental health challenges would raise concerns about their competency as a parent. One parent, even though they were aware of supports said ‘I didn't avail of any as I was too ashamed at the time’. Similar findings in other studies both nationally and internationally suggests more work is necessary in this area to support parents to get the help they need. Other barriers flagged by parents included money, work and childcare, highlighting some of the practical difficulties of accessing supports too.
Another issue some parents experience relates to taking medication for their mental health. Experiences differed with some parents highlighting how important their medication was in enabling them to parent. One parent noted that ‘If I don’t take the medication I won’t be able to parent my children’ while another said ‘To be the best mother that I can, it was agreed with my mental health team to continue the medication for life’. Others highlighted positive discussions with their doctors around medication.
Read more: Are you suffering from parental burnout?
However, not all parents had positive experiences with medication and discussions around it. Only 27% of parents reported that their role as a parent was always included in discussions about medication, while 19% said it sometimes was, but 54% said it never was. One parent described how only one of their total number of appointments ever included their role as a parent in the discussion, noting that ‘...after considerable time trying to engage and get help, years of struggle, one meeting discussed medication’. Another parent said ‘I always made it clear that I could not be sleepy, or take a medication to make me sleep’.
Every parent, every child and every family is different. Supports that work for one parent may not work for another, both in terms of parenting and in terms of mental health. More than half of parents in the survey indicated that they had accessed parenting support from family and friends, while about a third of parents used private family therapy or counselling. Similarly, in terms of informing parents about supports, parents indicated that the most useful methods included via their GP, social media, posters, word of mouth and schools. The least useful methods were advertisements on the TV and radio, or through webinars and seminars.
Highlighting the complex interaction between parenting and mental health challenges, one parent said ‘I get overwhelmed easily, especially parenting alone it feels like a battle between my child and my mental health. I'm trying to teach my son the importance of regulating feelings in a safe way and for him to talk. But I feel like a hypocrite because I am unable to do those things when I am overwhelmed’. In addition to making parenting more difficult, being a parent with mental health challenges brings its own additional challenges too, such as talking with a child about mental health.
It is clear that many parents and families in Ireland are struggling with mental health challenges, and more needs to done to help them. Given the individual nature of the difficulties people experience and their different family circumstances, a diverse range of supports, resources and networks is required to suit the diversity of needs and experiences of each parent seeking support.
Thanks to the Building Connections Research Team from the HSE, Tusla, Clarecare and parent partners for their collaboration with this research.
European Mental Health Week takes place from May 19th to 25th May.
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Dr Suzanne Egan is a Lecturer in Psychology at Mary Immaculate College. She is a Research Ireland awardee. Prof Niamh Stack is Head of the Department of Psychology at Mary Immaculate College. Dr Clara Hoyne is a Postdoctoral Researcher in Psychology at Mary Immaculate College.
The views expressed here are those of the author and do not represent or reflect the views of RTÉ.
