With a busy life and a thriving business, former actress Aoibhín Garrihy talks honestly to Janice Butler about the challenges of being a working parent, putting down roots in the west and why she's probably put acting behind her.
While our beautiful cover images of Aoibhín Garrihy were taken in her newly built home in Ennis, Co Clare, the businesswoman travelled up to her old stomping ground of Dublin for our chat and to attend a women in business masterclass the same day. "I find Dublin so busy now when I come back up. I’ve got used to the pace in the West, people aren’t as hurried," she remarks.
The former actress, a mother of three (Hanorah, 5, Líobhan, 4, and Isla, 2½), is in the throes of opening the final stages of her lifestyle store Beo in Ennis.
Beo is the wellness brand that she established in 2017 with Ennis-native Sharon Connellan. There’s an impression, I tell her, from social media, that she’s doing all of these things with ease. She’s quick to correct me on that front.
"Oh no, I’m dropping balls all over the place. I feel like I am anyhow. I don’t think you can do it all, all of the time. While I’m here today chatting with you, I’m worrying about who's going to drop to gymnastics, I need to relieve the childminder and I need to be back at a certain time; it’s all swirling around in my head," she says, of a situation many will relate to.
"Even when I was going out the door this morning, there were the sad faces because I wouldn’t be there to pick up, so it’s that guilt all the time. It’s not easy and I don’t think it ever gets easy," she adds.
Aoibhín spent much of her 20s living a very different life; a single woman in Dublin, appearing on the biggest soap in the country (Fair City, playing Neasa Dillion), on stage in shows such as Pride and Prejudice and starring opposite Jamie Dornan in The Fall.
Life then took a different turn in 2010 when she met her now husband, John Burke, during a family wedding at John’s hotel, the Armada in Spanish Point, when her dad, Eugene, played matchmaker.
The couple were married in 2016 and with John’s business firmly established in the West, Aoibhín decided to step away from acting and embrace a new existence. She admits it was lonely at the start, leaving behind the network of her family: parents Eugene and Clare and sisters Ailbhe and Doireann, who she describes as her "rocks".
"It was hard, initially, for sure. I was leaving a career for one thing, and then family and a support network; everything I knew I suppose," she says. "And John was so busy with the business, so it was lonely at that point and I really needed to figure out what I was going to do and where I was at. I needed to figure out my own well-being. It feels like such a distant memory and now, the thought of loneliness when you have three kids, sounds glorious; you can’t get peace even going to the toilet," she laughs.
Things certainly got busy; the couple had three children, three girls in quick succession. "We had two of them around the time of lockdown, sure there was nothing else to do!" she laughs. "It was definitely intense and still is, but I’m starting to see the benefits of it now, that they’ll play away together. My sisters are my two best friends so if we can manage to clone that and make sure that they’re close growing up, that would be wonderful. But they’re totally different; I still have them dressed the same though, but I’d say that’s coming to an end," she says.
Searching for something fulfilling to do, Aoibhín set up a business of her own. Along with her business partner, Sharon, she created Beo (meaning "life" or "living" in Irish) in 2017, a lifestyle brand which blends live events promoting self-care, with products sourced from local west of Ireland suppliers. The leap from actress to entrepreneur may seem an unexpected one but Aoibhín says that having come from a family with a history of start-ups (her dad set up Dublin Bay Cruises), it was always an interest of hers.
"I came from a family of entrepreneurs and when I first met John, I was almost envious of his business, because he reaped what he sowed, when you work hard and graft, you can see the fruits of your labour," she says. "Whereas with acting, I never felt in control and that used to kill me. That time in between jobs when I didn’t have work really jarred with me because I felt I didn’t have a reason to get up and get out and work. So that part of the industry didn’t really sit well with me. I knew there was an itch there, to do something for myself but I hadn’t figured out what it was."
The business started with a single event and grew organically from that. The new headquarters in Ennis will house everything from workshops to events, as well as a shop and coffee. "We thought it was something women needed, and we saw the demand for it. We didn’t have any business plan at the start; it really grew in an organic way. There was a wellness movement happening about eight years ago, but it hadn’t trickled beyond Dublin, so there was a gap there for us to fill. It’s a community and a way for people, mostly women, to come together and feel part of something. We want it as somewhere that people can come to fill their cup; I always loved that saying, 'You can’t pour from an empty vessel’.
"Sometimes I feel like I’ve bitten off more than I can chew, but I’ve never been risk averse. I always just dive straight in."
Would she ever return to acting? "I miss the doing of it for sure. And if I ever see old photos from that time, I think ‘Wow, that was magical,’" she says. "But I don’t think I’d even be cut out for it now and does it lend itself to family life? Probably not, even though I know plenty who have done it really well. I feel like I’ve hung up my acting boots and I don’t think that life is for me any more."
When it comes to her own wellness, she admits she doesn’t always practice what she preaches, but she tries to get out into the wild beauty of wet Clare as much as he can.
"I feel very lucky where I’m based because we’re so close to nature and the sea. It’s on our doorstep and I never take that for granted. I take great solace in being in the sea or near it; that for me is therapy," she says. "I definitely need to do more of it, but it’s getting time isn’t it? I feel like I’m in the eye of the storm at the moment with the kids. I think men are much better at taking that time. It’s a non-negotiable for them, so I think women need to be more like that," she adds.
She has released two books in recent years, Every Day is a Fresh Beginning and Every Night is Full of Stars, two collections of poetry chosen by Aoibhín. She remarks that she’s always found huge comfort in poetry. "Poetry is probably a segway to a reflective or mediative state for me. I need an aid like that because I wouldn’t have the discipline to sit and meditate. It helps me deal with emotions and sort of validates them for me."
There was cause for celebration in the Garrihy household recently with sister Doireann, co-host of Dancing with the Stars, getting engaged to boyfriend, Mark Mehigan. While she wasn’t spilling any tea on the details, Aoibhín did confirm that her and sister Ailbhe will be bridesmaids on the big day.
"We are! I think it’s fairly obvious that we’re the bridesmaids; we’ve got the nod," she says, answering cautiously, afraid to give anything away. "It’s very exciting and it’s gorgeous to see them so happy. Now that she’s finished with Dancing with the Stars, Doireann can spend time planning it."
As for Aoibhín, she finished her coffee and she’s off to her masterclass, nervous but excited about both it and the future.
"I think you need to be open to change and I’ve always been like that. I’m a glass half full kind of person and whenever opportunity lands on your lap, you’ve got to take it and roll with it. I’ve never been one to overthink things, or to look back; always forward."
