Home and family have always been abiding concerns for the TV cook and author, Donal Skehan. With his latest TV series, he rediscovers those priorities. Donal O'Donoghue talks to him.
"At the end of the documentary, we talk about what making these two programmes meant to me," says Donal Skehan of Donal's Feasts, Fasts and Festivals, the two-part TV series that has the self-made cook visiting religious communities in Ireland, learning their rituals and traditions, and sitting with families to break bread or eat dhal or sip chicken soup with matzah balls.
"For me, it all comes back to that Sunday dinner as a child," says Skehan. "I don’t know if it was mum’s Catholic upbringing, but Sunday was sacrosanct for us. We all sat down as a family and would have that space and time to talk and share. That’s also a big part of what my wife Sofie and I try to create for our children, Noah (5) and Oliver (3). No matter what you go through in life, having that place to come back to is so important, and across every faith we experienced that thing of breaking bread and spending time with family."
We talk via Zoom, Skehan’s beaming, boyish face (he’s 37 for God’s sake!) making him look like the happiest cook on the planet. "I’m definitely not like this all the time," he says with a big laugh. "Sofie and Kate, my assistant, will tell you that too: there are darker days." But right now, he has reasons to be cheerful, with a new TV show, a new book (Home Kitchen is due next month) but most importantly, after years of renting and shuttling between his native Dublin and Los Angeles with a young family, he has a forever home.
Earlier this year, he and Sofie got the keys to a little cottage by the sea in Sutton (a short schlep from Skehan’s family home in Howth), following what he calls a "vomit-inducing battle against a fellow bidder." This bijou residence is rich with potential, even if they’re "still in the throes of figuring out what it can become".
Home is a recurring theme in the TV series, the books and this conversation. "We’re not allowed to talk about the book, only the TV show," says Skehan with a laugh when I wave Home Kitchen in front of the camera. Ah yes, the two-part Feasts, Fasts and Festivals, not your average cookery show but a whistle-stop tour of the diverse ethnic and religious communities in this country (including Jewish, Hare Krishna, Sikh, Hindu, Muslim and Romanian Orthodox) with an emphasis on the role food plays in each.
Skehan’s passion for food shines through as he rolls up his sleeves, fasting for one day of Ramadan ("You can’t even drink water," says Donal, who never seemed likely to go the distance) and stirring up vast pots of food as well as tinkling a Hindu bell. "Hopefully the show will knock down some preconceived ideas that some people might have about the various religious communities that we visited."
In the opening episode, Skehan gives us the lay of the land, saying that while he was raised in a Catholic home, it was never that big a deal and he is no longer practising. "Both of my maternal grandparents were sculptors who primarily worked for the Catholic church, so my mother grew up in a pretty strict household," he says.
"They would have gone to Mass a lot and the archbishop would have visited the house. Consequently, I think my mum rebelled a bit against all of that. So, when we were kids, it was not as strict and we went to Mass only for the big feast days. But while I’m not a practising Catholic, I do appreciate the routine and rituals that are so deeply engrained in Irish culture that it’s very hard to move away from them. Obviously, there are the church scandals in recent years, but there are also the positive aspects with rules for life that push you in the right direction."
His grandparents, both of whom died in recent years, sculpted religious artefacts and pieces that still grace many churches around the country. "You’d drop into their house after school and my granny would be making life-sized pieces of Mother Mary holding baby Jesus. That was very much part of growing up. Now, despite not being a practising Catholic, our house is filled with crucifixes and a tabernacle and all these beautiful pieces made by my grandparents.
"Just last night, I was debating with my mum who has this beautiful carved bird from a tabernacle that my granddad made. It was hung up on her wall and I said, 'That’s ours! My granddad gave that to me.’ She said he didn’t but then I found this video in which my granddad is giving that very bird to my first-born, Noah! So the house is filled with all those religious artefacts."
The last time we met, the country was still in the grip of the pandemic and Skehan, like many others, was struggling with his mental health. "Looking back at those three years, I can understand now why it all came to a head," he says now. "We were in this constant ‘flight or fight’ experience. When Noah was born, we had to battle to get health insurance in the US and being away from home, you lacked the usual support network of wider family. We had to jump over umpteen hurdles to get to where we needed to be, and it felt like the rug was constantly being pulled from under us.
"When we finally bought the house, it changed so much. Even the last 12 months has brought the stress levels down. But my mental health is something that I work on all the time. Even making those documentaries was a reminder to try to always stay present and step away from the treadmill. I’m very aware of that when trying to combat my own anxiety or stress."
Was there ever a time he and Sofie contemplated a forever life in the US? "Certainly, in the early stages," he says. "We did end up living there for over four years, but we always talked about coming back home at some stage and Covid cemented it as those opportunities to fly easily between the two countries went out the window. Also, we needed to figure out at that point where the boys were going to go to school.
"I would happily have stayed in Los Angeles: I loved the lifestyle out there, but I always felt that we were treading water in the States, having meetings, making new friends, whereas here there is a lovely sense of security and of being settled. And having bought our own home has truly anchored us here and given us that sense of grounding we were always seeking."
A week after we spoke, Skehan was on the road again: back in the USA and zipping around Texas (Houston, Dallas Cowboys, Texas State Fair, etc.) filming for ITV’s This Morning. Earlier in the year, there were family holidays to France, Marrakesh and Istanbul with Noah and Oliver expanding their palates and their dad, as ever, absorbing information about the local cuisine for potential future projects.
For the former boyband member, it all started with a food blog in 2007 followed by the publication of Good Mood Food in 2009. "The boys are pretty adventurous and in Marrakesh they were eating eyeballs and other bits," he says. Seriously? "They have an interest in food which we hope to nourish in the years ahead. Most days, we try to eat as a family. They might not be aware of it now, but over the next few years, hopefully, it will be a legacy of their childhood."
So, in a way, food is their religion? "Yes, as it is mine," says the still smiling Skehan.
Home Kitchen by Donal Skehan is published by Yellow Kite on October 12.
