Filling in for Jennifer Zamparelli on RTÉ 2FM, presenter Lottie Ryan spoke with the show's resident sex therapist, Rachel Cooke, to find out if people really have a 'type' when it comes to dating. Listen back above.
According to Rachel, your type is the pattern of people found in your dating behaviour, for example, you may always date people with similar backgrounds, jobs, interests, looks, etc. For others, it might be a certain dynamic that they seek out.
"There's all sorts of types out there, and most people will say that they have one or two types that they are particularly drawn to, which may be very successful or spectacularly unsuccessful."
Speaking about how our own experiences and mindsets can lead us to feeling attracted to particular types of people, Rachel says that we often seek out those who have been wounded in similar ways to ourselves.
"We're all wounded one way or another during our upbringing and we develop these kind of defensive coping mechanisms to manage, which happens unconsciously, but I think we tend to fall in love or be attracted to partners who were wounded in relatively similar developmental stages as us."
"One person might really need space and to withdraw from stressful situations, so that might mean that we're attracted to someone who needs much more closeness and wants to talk through that. So we might have been developmentally wounded in similar ways but we're much more attracted to people who respond to that, possibly in the opposite way."
Reflecting on how our types may change over time, Rachel reminds listeners that as we grow and change through life, so too will our romantic prospects.
"Generally, as we learn to understand ourselves better, we'll seek people who maybe fit in better with our lives rather than someone who, in the beginning, we might base it more on looks or on someone who gives us massive butterflies - which is often a sign that maybe they're unavailable to us, and that's what's getting us going, potentially."
Break-ups will also lead us to reflect on who we are and what we want from our future relationships, and can sometimes lead us to shift our priorities when it comes to our swiping habits.
To find out why we have a type in the first place and how to ditch the habit, listen back above.
