As a former female captain in the Irish Naval Service for over 20 years, and one of the Navy's first female officers, Marie Gleeson had to adjust to being a woman in leadership in such an industry.
Speaking on stage at the Pendulum Summit 2022 in Dublin's RDS, she recalled how while on a mission to Chad with the UN she encountered people who weren't used to listening to a woman leader. Rather than give up on her efforts, she listened to them.
"I had to understand their perspective", she tells RTÉ Lifestyle. "I had to sit down with them and ask questions and be curious, and go away and do my own research.
Over 20 years military service - at home, at sea and overseas. Proud to serve and proud of those I have served with throughout #notbored #lifeiswhatyoumakeofit @naval_service @defenceforces defence pic.twitter.com/riDHVN56Ik
— Marie Gleeson (@marie_prior) February 2, 2019
"It was a very easy assumption for me to make that they were being sexist or to judge them, but actually I had to step away from judgement and educate myself, and understand why it was they thought that way."
She adds that "we do make an awful lot of assumptions, we jump to assumptions quite quickly". "I do that myself even now, and I have to stop myself and challenge myself."
As a mother to two young girls, aged six and five, Gleeson says she's wary of the habit in "the current culture" to "shut people down very, very quickly".
"I suppose I'm concerned for my girls going into the future ... about this perception that there's only one voice in the room and if you've a different opinion you'll be shut down or not allowed have your opportunity to speak", she says.
As a cadet and then captain of the L.E. Aoife, Gleeson says she thrived on conversation and differing opinions: "I love debate, I live on debate. I love different perspectives, I love arguing my perspective, but I love sometimes learning that I'm wrong or that there's a different thought process. Be open, be curious and educate yourself before you make a judgement."
Gleeson mastered openness and curiosity as a captain, as managing a team challenged her to become more empathetic and honest. In this way, there's clearly overlap with motherhood, something Gleeson talks about with sensitivity and passion.
"I'm not as calm and composed as a mother!" she laughs, though when I ask how she skills carry over between work and home. "I think my children would say that or my husband would say it.
"It's so weird, actually, my perspective as a mother is not as strong as my perspective as a leader in some respects. I find I have to step back out sometimes and check myself in my response to things."
However, ever the leader, Gleeson says one focus of hers as a mother is to "inspire them to believe in themselves".
"It may sound silly but we do have this little thing at home, that 'you can do it!' It could be as simple as one of the girls fell off her bike in a really bad accident, was really unsure about getting back up again but it was that, 'let's do it, let's do it slowly, you can do it'.
"My little girls will run around now and I'll hear them talking to each other and it's like, you can do it! I'm thinking, I hope they don't go too far with some of this stuff!"
