He might be one of the best-loved agony uncles – alongside his chat show and Radio 2 presenting duties, of course – but Graham Norton insists that none of the drama in his latest novel, A Keeper, stems from his own readers’ problems.
Norton, 55, weaves lonely hearts, contemporary single parenthood, suicide, mental health issues and fractured relationships into the tale – and at times, the writing is quite dark.
"We all have dark times," he reflects. "Maybe it’s because I’m Irish but, for me, dark times are private times. I might talk to friends but I’m not going to write a newspaper column about it."
‘People are resilient and inspiring’
While his story lines aren’t taken from his Telegraph agony column however, he admits he can see the connection, and notes: "What’s interesting about the agony column is people’s resilience and what people can cope with – and I always find that inspiring."
Wearing my @mentalhealth pin for #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek To help help raise awareness, get your badge here: https://t.co/wiICQTqjvW pic.twitter.com/C45xQDZSeA
— graham norton (@grahnort) May 16, 2018
Radio 2 listeners will hear Norton and fellow comedian Maria McErlane mull over readers’ letters on his Saturday morning agony slot, often taking different standpoints on issues, and there is much laughter on the show.
‘We end up sobbing’
"Sometimes we go over the edge," says Norton. "It all depends on what the problem is. Sometimes the problems are just stupid so you can ridicule people, but if it’s a real problem and you feel that people have actually properly written in for our help, then you have to be respectful.
"We’ve had such sad things. We had woman with a terminal illness who wanted to know about building memories with her children. Maria and I just ended up sobbing through that."
‘I’m not a qualified counsellor’
Norton, who lives in London with his beloved dogs, laughs loudly when asked if he takes himself seriously as an agony columnist.
"I don’t have qualifications. I’m 55, I’ve been around the block and I take the Telegraph column seriously because there’s a duty of care there. In one letter out of three, I would suggest that people do talk to a proper counsellor or consult a doctor. I still stick my oar in but then I’m covered."
‘It’s natural for parents to worry when their children come out’
There’s a strand in the novel highlighting a mother’s concern that her son might be gay – only to find, to her relief, that he isn’t. So what’s Norton’s personal take on this?
"If you are a parent, you want the simplest life for your child. People face enough dramas in their lives, with finding jobs, relationships, whatever. Even if you’re the most tolerant ‘I love gay people’ sort of parent, it just means your child’s life is a little bit more complicated," he says.
"It’s not a homophobic reaction, it’s just a thing where you feel you’re going to have to look out for your kid a bit more than you would have."
Being brought up in Ireland, Norton well remembers his country’s attitude to homosexuality. "Narrow-minded doesn’t cover it. It was un-minded. It didn’t exist! Ireland’s a great one for ignoring problems. There were no gay people, so you couldn’t be homophobic. It’s like there was no racism because there was no other race. We had to hate Catholics and Protestants because there was no one else to hate!
"If I had come out, it would have been more than difficult. I may have been dead in a ditch."
When he came out to his parents, he suspected they just worried for him initially. "In my parents’ generation, if you saw a gay person in a drama, the chances are they weren’t that happy. They were either the murder victim, a serial killer, or they’d kill themselves. They didn’t live next door. They were there for a dark reason. To discover that’s the role your kid has cast themselves in is distressing.
"But what’s great is that my father, before he died, and my mum were both part of my world in London. They met me and my partner at the time and have known my friends all those years. My mother is very much part of my whole world and doesn’t worry about me now," he adds.
‘I’m still having fun’
Although he could afford to retire, he says he doesn’t want to.
"You see friends who don’t work and they go a bit Billy bonkers. They over-analyse everything and become involved in the minutiae of their lives," Norton reasons. "It’s not very healthy. I just want to carry on while I’m still having fun."
A Keeper by Graham Norton is published by Hodder & Stoughton on October 4.
