Sinead Farrelly has just one hour of international football under her belt with the Republic of Ireland – and yet it feels like so much weighs on her shoulders at this World Cup in Australia and New Zealand.
She was a shock call-up in the days before Ireland's April friendly against the USA in Austin, the FAI sorting out the paperwork in time for her to make a debut.
Farrelly had only recently returned to the game after an eight-year hiatus, having suffered concussion in a serious car crash in 2015. That period was profoundly stressful for the Pennsylvania-born midfielder for additional reasons. In 2021, she and her old team-mate Mana Shim went public with allegations against former Portland Thorns coach Paul Riley, the subsequent investigations finding widespread sexual abuse and misconduct in the NWSL.
In March 2023 Farrelly came back to football, joining New Jersey outfit Gotham FC. A month later she shone for Ireland, and now she’s going to a World Cup – a head-spinning journey that she’s still trying to process.
"It’s been difficult and wonderful, lots of ups and downs but I wouldn’t have chosen another way. I’m just grateful for it," the 33-year-old reflects now.
"I pretty much gave up soccer for good. It’s definitely been on my mind as I’ve come back. It was causing me a lot of anxiety at first because I was like, 'I have so much I have to catch up on, I’m not where everyone else is’.
"I shifted my perspective. There’s nothing else I can do at this point. I’m here, I just have to show up with where I’m at and what I have and trust it’ll be enough. If it’s not I’ll take a different path, but so far, so good."
"I felt pretty fragile on this journey back."
Vera Pauw has vowed to start her strongest team against France in Thursday’s final friendly before the squad leave for Australia. And that means we’ll see Farrelly from the off.
In her 60 minutes on the pitch against the USA – who she represented up to Under-23 level – Farrelly showed a precious ability to keep a hold of the ball in tight spaces; to give team-mates the opportunity to break out from their defensive shape and prevent Ireland from being pinned back. That quality is gold dust to Pauw, the manager dishing out plenty of praise for the springtime recruit.
"All of that stuff is helpful for my confidence," Farrelly added. "I felt pretty fragile on this journey back. I’m like, ‘oh my God I need all the external validation I can get!’
"It’s more about feeling supported, feeling worthy and like I belong here. Anyone along my journey that’s had kind of words to say has really helped me so much. I’d have quit so long ago if it was me and my brain doing this because I am very critical and have a lot of self doubt.
"I’m just grateful for any kind words people have to say."
And what of her Irish roots? The Farrellys hail from Virginia in Co Cavan, where the ties remain strong. They are, naturally, full of pride. Her dad is the only one of the clan who moved to the States, so there’s always an abundance of cousins, aunts and uncles to catch up with.
"After I was born we moved back to Ireland so we had some years of my childhood here. I started kindergarten in the States but we would come back all the time.
"My sister is moving here now, we have a house in Delvin. Ireland has been a huge part of my family for so long.
"My family is so stoked because of how much Ireland has influenced our family and our family life. We love coming here. We’ve always loved our time here so the fact I get to represent this country and they get to see me in this jersey is very surreal and amazing.
"It’s been amazing. I’ve kind of been thrown into it and I love that. I’m seeing all the support from everyone for this team and for this journey. It’s good to spark that excitement and let things settle in that this is really happening."
It will be interesting to see how well Farrelly slots into this Ireland side against a very good French outfit this week.
Her ability is not in question; but with selection comes expectation. It’s something Farrelly is very aware of, albeit over-thinking these things feeds anxiety. Right now she’s just taking it all as it comes.
"The team and the staff are amazing," she stressed. "The girls are so supportive. It’s a little difficult to be new around the team, especially a team that’s so established and they’re all really close and stuff but they’ve made me feel so welcome. And just seeing the support of the entire nation behind this team, I feel supported in that too.
"It’s been incredible. It’s been crazy. I feel like I haven’t had a moment to sit and think about it.
"It’s been rewarding obviously, when you are challenged more there’s more reward at the end. I’ve grown so much as a person and that really to me is what life is about so I’m so grateful for this journey.
"The next game to me is France. It’s a day-to-day thing for me. If I think too far ahead it’s overwhelming."
Watch Republic of Ireland v France on Thursday night from 7.30pm on RTÉ2 and RTÉ Player, follow a live blog on RTÉ.ie/Sport and the RTÉ News app or listen to live commentary on an extended Game On with 2fm
