You have no idea how difficult it is to find a dictionary in RTÉ these days. Damien Richardson or Rico to his friends is well able to spin a line or two.
His programme notes when he was manager of Cork City were legendary. No word was ever deemed superfluous. His erudition was enlightening. His interdenominational philosophy often inspired.
Having Rico on the MNS couch didn't quite scare me. However, and in consideration of the fact that the Ska Battalion had considered his lack of knowledge of a major musical movement to be pusillanimous, to say the least, made me realise that I would need a dictionary or, if you will a 'rictionary' for the duration of the show.
Ryle Nugent, I was told, had a small one in his office but we needed the biggest we could find for the enormity of the task ahead. Perhaps it will come as no surprise to many of you that nobody else in the sports department had one.
'You can check stuff online,' I was told by a few people who assured me they would never do their research on the basis of Google or Wikipedia alone.
I eventually tracked down a copy of Chambers Twentieth Century in the Newsroom and was allowed borrow it on the strict condition that it had to be back for the Nine O Clock bulletin. So last century, but this was perfect for the task in hand considering most of Rico's terminology is antediluvian anyway.
Our first game of the FAI cup quarter-finals round-up featured the champions Bohemians and Sligo Rovers from Dalymount. As we were about to begin the analysis of the match, I suggested to Damien that perhaps Bohemians failure to record a victory again was an indication of a lack of form and an ongoing decline of a previously exalted standard?
'Indupitably' replied the wily linguist and I almost had a Con moment as I felt the giggles rise within me.
MNS or Monday Night Soccer is one of the most fun shows to be involved in. Like minded people who love the game consider the job to be more of a privilege than a chore. We'd sit around all night talking and watching football and very often the on air debate would continue long after the credits have rolled.
James, Eamon, Seamus, Michelle, Kevin and Kevin are the real heroes of the show and, to be fair, the slagging can be fairly merciless at times.
Con often makes reference to 'Our Brummie editor, Steve' and his important part in the making of MNS, but can I just point out that I haven't understood a word Steve has said in the last two years.
Con, I thought, went in a bit hard on all the ball boys and ball girls within the League of Ireland a few weeks ago. How on earth though can these kids be expected to hone and refine their skills when managers like Longford’s Gareth Cronin show such great skill in flicking the ball back into play from a position behind their back with the FAI Cup itself in mortal danger from a stray pass at the Flan Siro?
Maybe I was a bit hard on Eamonn Donohoe, whose return to the midlands with the famous trophy so inextricably linked with Longford, was clearly a labour of love. It was a fine piece of television as Stephen 'Digger' O'Brien recalled many famous Longford finals.
I felt a bit sorry for former St Pat's star Colm Foley, ( a proper centre half!) alongside me on the couch, who seems to be reminded of THAT Cup final every time he appears on the show.
The feature on Waterford with James O'Toole and Joanne Cantwell reminded us of how huge the crowds were in the glory days for the Blues and maybe, just maybe, the people of Waterford may be at the beginning of another glorious era for the game in that sport mad county.
Some people think that the little information straps that appear on screen as the panellists begin their spiel are completely made up. Nothing could be further from the truth!
Eoin Hand, or Danny Farrell as he is known in some musical circles, is about to be unleashed on CD shortly with an album of greatest hits sung in his own inimitable style.
'After the Ball' may describe some of Hand’s more dubious tackles in his playing days but it's also the title track of an album of Eoin in full flight recorded at John B Keane’s legendary pub in Listowel.
Produced by songwriter Mickey McConnell, the man who wrote 'Only Our Rivers Run Free' and featuring 'The Working Man', 'The Nightingale' and 'Come By the Hills' among others, the collection is in aid of Irish Guide Dogs for the Blind and is due out next month.
Honestly. You couldn't make it up!
Con will be back in the midst of the madness at the centre of the couch next Monday.
