Chelsea left-back Ashley Cole insists he is not a malicious player after apologising for his horror tackle on Alan Hutton in their 4-4 draw against Tottenham.
Cole also stressed he did not mean to show a lack of respect to referee Mike Riley by turning his back on the official while he was trying to book him for the challenge.
Cole issued an apology for his 'studs-up' tackle on the Spurs player after watching the incident on television yesterday morning.
But while the England defender admitted his tackle was a bad one, he maintains his actions were not deliberate and he is not a 'dirty' player.
Cole declared: 'It wasn't malicious and I'm a little disappointed with what people are saying, that I meant it.
'Of course it was a bad tackle at the time but in the heat of the moment you want to win the game and win every tackle, and, as I said, I'm sorry for Alan, but it was never meant.
'I didn't mean to go in hard that way. It was high but I tried to read the ball and get the ball first, but he was a little bit too quick for me.
'I'd like to apologise to anyone I offended and of course Alan Hutton who I tackled.'
Cole's conduct towards Riley was roundly condemned and the 27-year-old former Arsenal defender, who has suffered with personal problems off the pitch this season, admitted he has got to improve his attitude in the future.
Cole told Chelsea TV: 'I'm an emotional person, things can happen on the pitch very quickly but I didn't mean to disrespect the referee.
'I recognise this is a part of my game that I need to work on and control.'
Chelsea coach Avram Grant claimed the scrutiny that surrounded Cole's tackle once again highlighted the double standards his club has had to endure.
Grant has on several occasions this season insisted there is one rule for other clubs and one rule for Chelsea over standards of behaviour on the pitch.
Cole's tackle sparked a furious reaction from the Spurs backroom staff but the defender will not face any further punishment for turning his back on the official.
Spurs assistant coach Gus Poyet confronted Cole at half-time when he walked down the tunnel and that did not please Grant.
'I was angry that everyone jumped on him, including their bench,' said Grant. 'When we do these things people say we are not behaving right.'
The Football Association have tried to encourage more respect for officials this week and Chelsea have been guilty in the past of surrounding referees.
They received a £40,000 fine for their conduct in the clash against Derby, but Grant protested: 'We give a lot of respect to the official, if you see our players they don't have a problem with these things.'
