Broken Love: My Journey through Loss and Grief is the first book by 28-year-old broadcaster Meghann Scully who opened her heart and told the story of how she lost her 18-year-old brother in a car crash and how her father died afterwards, of a broken heart as she says.  Her father was extraordinary horseman Maxi Scully who broke a world record for bareback show jumping despite a lifetime of ill health and a kidney transplant that he was not expected to survive.  Meghann spoke to Ryan Tubridy about the moment of her brother Marcus' death when she was 15 years old.

"Everything in that moment completely changed.  I remember all the family, everyone started roaring crying and Mum fell to the ground and Dad was trying to hold her and then family members were all trying to grab each other and everyone just started grabbing me and I remember just thinking I didn't want anyone to touch me… because I wouldn't believe it.  This wasn't happening.  This wasn't real.  I was 15 years old I wasn't ready to say goodbye to my brother."

Meghann tried to stay strong for her parents and push down the feelings of grief, but not long afterwards, her father's health declined dramatically and he also passed away.

"I was with him holding his hand when he died…  When I saw Marcus after he died, he was in the hospital bed laid out.  His cheeks were still rosy, he looked the exact same as he always looked.  Dad, the illness had got the better of him and he had kind of wasted away…  It's not really what you want to remember so sometimes I try and bring myself back and I talk even about some of the lovely moments we had together with the horses so I try and change my memory."

During her master's degree, however, something snapped in Meghann and she could no longer keep her grief under wraps.

"Grief got to me before I got to grief.  I always describe it as being this bottle that was so full that I couldn't keep it closed anymore and it just burst.  That's literally what happened, it just burst open one day and I started crying and I couldn't stop…  I had to ring my mother and she had to come into my college house and she just looked at me on the sofa and she said, now is your time to grieve."

Meghann's book chronicles her journey to acceptance through the murky waters of uncontrollable grief and the life she created for herself on the other side.

Click here to listen to The Ryan Tubridy Show