When Coldplay frontman Chris Martin spotted a middle-aged couple embracing on the big screen 'Kiss Cam' at their concert last July, no one could have predicted the fallout.
The singer’s initial "Oh, look at these two," comment sparked panic with the man diving out of shot and the woman hiding behind a barrier.
Their behaviour led to another comment from the band frontman. "Either they're having an affair or they're just very shy."
The ‘Coldplay Couple,’ refers to Kirsten Cabot, then-head of HR and her boss Andy Byron, who was then CEO of US tech company Astronomer.
The canoodling incident went mega viral and led to widespread online threats, with internet sleuths assuming an illicit affair and TV shows parodying the incident
Ms Cabot later stated she was separated at the time, although her boss was still married.
Mr Byron resigned from his position as CEO shortly after the incident, and, as of late last year, was still with his wife.
Ms Cabot lost her job over the controversy but is now ‘taking back the narrative’ by speaking out at PRWeek Crisis Comms Conference in Washington, D.C., in April.
We spend so much of our waking lives at work with like-minded people, it is not unusual for relationships to develop in the workplace.
But is it a good idea?
Broadly speaking romantic relationships are not prohibited in the workplace in Ireland
However, romantic relationships at work can lead to serious HR issues.
No legal obligation
Employers commonly have concerns that such relationships may give rise to complaints involving bullying, harassment, sexual harassment, discrimination, breach of confidentiality or conflicts of interest.
As we saw from the Coldplay concert, where one person is in a senior leadership position, there is potential for negative publicity depending on the circumstances.
There is no legal obligation on an employee to disclose a workplace relationship.
But it can be helpful for employers to have a policy in place requiring employees to notify them if there is a romantic relationship with a colleague, especially between senior and junior employees.
The evolving nature of modern relationships and "situationships" can make drafting such policies more complex, according to Lewis Silkin Partner Joanne Hyde, a specialist employment lawyer with over 30 years of experience.
A situationship is a romantic or sexual relationship that lacks clear definition, labels, or commitment.
"Now we have situationships which can make it quite difficult to have a policy because how do you set the threshold for when there's a requirement to disclose a relationship to HR? Then if somebody discloses it, you have to disclose that the relationship is broken down, does HR keep a log of it and where's the line between privacy?" explained Ms Hyde.
"The situationships are becoming more fleeting, I’ve come across situations where you have employees that are in a stable relationship and then having an affair with somebody at work, so it just seems to be more common now than what I would have come across earlier on in my career," she added.
An employee’s right of privacy is also safeguarded under the Irish Constitution, data protection legislation and common law.
So, companies may choose to rely on base principles of professionalism at work and treating each other with dignity and respect.
When a relationship ends
Another concern for employers is when relationships end, if they turn and bad spill over into the workplace, it becomes a toxic relationship.
This can disrupt the workplace if an aggrieved party is sending unwanted WhatsApp messages, engages in stalking behaviour or there are allegations of sexual harassment or bullying following the breakdown of the relationship.
Any workplace issues or grievances that arise are dealt with promptly.
"It really depends on what the behaviour is that is causing the problem. Sometimes a simple transfer of one party can just resolve it," noted Ms Hyde.
"Sometimes it's actually much more serious, it's harassment behaviour which has to be dealt with under Dignity at Work or Grievance Procedures," she said.
If issues arise that are not adequately covered by existing policies, employers might want to consider whether a specific policy should be introduced.
They should also consider whether mediation is appropriate and offer employees access to the Employee Assistance Programme, if available.
Some larger companies, like multinationals may have a zero-tolerance policy to certain workplace relationships.
These policies tend to be confined to large business, especially in financial services, or in businesses where there is a clear hierarchical relationship.
Particularly if there's a perception of an imbalance in power between somebody at a senior level with reporting responsibility, and someone in a junior role.
They’re not typically policies that happen too much in small and medium sized businesses.
In many SMEs, the opposite is the case, where the founders may indeed be married, according to ISME.
The relationships at work for SMEs are typically couples and family relationships, and this can sometimes result in blurred lines between personal and professional.
ISME says the main policy covering relationships at work and ensuring that all employees behave in a professional and respectful manner is the Dignity at Work Policy.
Despite most SMEs not having a policy specifically for Relationships at Work, there is nothing stopping them from introducing various protocols in this regard.
But for some couples mixing their personal and professional lives has been a resounding success.
'A blessing in disguise'
Darragh and Geina Mulcahy met eight years ago at Dublin airport on their way to the Western European Powerlifting Championship.
At the time, Darragh was working in a gym in Limerick and Geina was working in a gym in Waterford.
They decided they wanted to set up their own coach-led gym, and in 2019 they opened Raise the Bar in Tramore, Co Waterford.
"It kind of stuttered and stammered for a while, and it really kicked into gear after Covid," said Darragh.
Darragh described covid as "a blessing in disguise" because they received the PUP payment (covid unemployment payment).
"That was massive as we hadn't got paid at all, the business was making no money for the first year or two," he said.
"It got us a bit of breathing space and allowed us to do a course to help us actually grow the business and get good at running a business, and not just the coaching, personal training or strength conditioning which we were confident at."
Despite the challenges and struggles, Darragh and Geina say they complement each other in the workplace.
Geina takes a leading role in admin, one-on-ones with clients and their social media strategy, while Darragh excels in giving talks to larger groups.
"We always kept plugging away and for the most part we’ve enjoyed it. I know it sounds a bit cringey, but we’ve always had good craic, particularly at the start when we’d work every hour, we were the cleaners, doing the social media, every coaching session," he noted.
"Now we oversee the gym, but at the start it was just the two of us in each other’s pockets every single day and living together, it was brilliant," he said.
After getting married in 2023, Darragh and Geina highly recommend working and living together 24-7.
"Just do it, bite the bullet and go for it," said Geina.
"Bring lots of patience," advises Darragh. "We could probably write a book on all the mistakes to make because we made them all. Just jump in, you'll figure it out as you go along and just try to laugh as much as you can through it."
'A lot of figuring out and learning'
In a more recent leap of faith Lisa and Dale Kavanagh opened The Goat House Sauna in Co Laois at the end of January.
The couple have been together for 12 years and married to each for two years.
Dale runs his own business Dale Kavanagh Steel (DKS), while Lisa works in the Pharmaceutical Industry.
But last summer, after a lot of thinking and planning, they started working together to get the groundwork started on their joint venture.
"We've been going to saunas for a couple of years and we really enjoy them," said Lisa.
"Dale is a fabric welder and his father is a carpenter, so ultimately he came up with the idea and decided they could build the sauna, and I was a supportive wife," she said.
"There's a lot of figuring out and learning and stuff, but we're getting there," added Dale.
The couple said they enjoy talking about their new business, so they don’t mind that it filters into their personal life.
As Dale had previously set up his own company, he had experience of running a business and dealing with the practical side of building the sauna.
For her part, Lisa looks after the admin side of the business along with the website and social media.
They said there’s a perfect amount of work to keep them both level and busy, explaining that the burden is never on one person.
"I don't feel like it's like consuming our lives or anything, we're both really enjoying it so far. It's been easy and we've been together so long that we actually can probably read each other's minds at this stage. We know each other's strengths and weaknesses when it comes to different aspects of running the business," she said.
The couple have their three pygmy goats for around a year now, and when they were planning the sauna, they decided their "boys" would be their unique selling point.
"We made sure we had a big, massive window so that anyone that comes can enjoy them.
"I think the pygmy goats enjoy the people more than the people enjoy the goats," she said laughing.
Dale and Lisa said for any couple considering going into business together to keep talking about it, discuss how it will affect your free time, and to still make time for each other.
"There is an element of stress involved with it, so if both people are aware that there will be stress and there will be long hours especially at the start, once both people are on board with that, that's the biggest thing because that can cause arguments and a bit of friction as well," he advised.
Unlike the Coldplay couple, some people are more successful at navigating their romance in the workplace.
But it's worth considering the fallout of a situationship or the pursuit of an office Valentine in the knowledge you could have a long career together ahead.
