Edgar Rice Bourroughs’ Tarzan is known for being one of the most colourful and adventurous stories of our time, but unfortunately the movie’s latest 3D outing will leave you swinging for the exit.

Millionaire adventurers John Greystoke (Deklin) and Alice (Newman) trek deep into the African jungle with their young son, originally JJ (Garner), on the hunt for an ancient meteorite that has wiped out the dinosaurs. But, Greystoke’s eagerness to find the mysterious energy source leaves his son an orphan.

JJ finds himself adopted by a sympathetic gorilla called Kala and renamed, Tarzan (Lutz), the king of the jungle. Enter the beautiful Jane Porter (Locke) the daughter of an African guide and scientist Jim (Bubb) who is committed to the conservation and preservation of the jungle.

With the new and greedy CEO of Greystoke Energies (St.John) hot on the tails of the star-crossed lovers - will Tarzan be able to save the world he grew up in? More importantly, will Tarzan ever find his clothes?

The 3D animation captures some strikingly beautiful moments when Tarzan is gliding through the air and prancing off trees or doing acrobatic moves with his ape clan. While the gorillas look impressive and credible (their fur looks so real), the motion-capture fails to do Tarzan’s character justice.

The ‘boy with no fur’ ends up looking really freaky, which is mainly down to his lack of facial expressions. The same can be said for the rest of the human characters that look like they were swiped out of an old-school video game.

Meanwhile, the voiceovers sound unnatural and forced. But let’s just be glad that the animals don’t talk!

There are several plot holes in the script that desperately needs to be expanded upon – How come a search party hasn’t found Tarzan by now? How do people know that the meteorite has special powers?

The demise of central characters, especially so early on in the movie, will leave some children hiding their heads in their popcorn buckets.

Unfortunately Tarzan lacks the charm and heart of its Disney predecessor and will leave you shouting 'I'm a Viewer...Get Me Out of Here!'

P.s Don't say I didn't warn you about the Coldplay moment.

Laura Delaney