Directed by Sara Sugarman, starring Lindsay Lohan, Adam Garcia, Glenne Headly, Alison Pill, Eli Marienthal, Carol Kane and Megan Fox.
A few months ago it was Hilary Duff in 'The Lizzie Maguire Movie' and now it's the turn of young actress Lindsay Lohan to show that she's an all-singing, all-dancing teen star and clothes-horse in 'Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen'. Unfortunately 'Confessions...' just isn't as fun. Lohan, fresh from holding her own with Jamie Lee Curtis in 'Freaky Friday', struggles with a confused plot and a script which never really takes off.
Directed by Sara Sugarman (making her studio debut after 'Very Annie Mary' and the appalling 'Mad Cows'), 'Confessions...' opens with a truly spectacular birds-eye view of New York, zooming in on Mary (Lohan), bidding farewell to her mother and sisters as they leave the city for the sticks of New Jersey. It's a great start, a fantasy sequence (complete with a nod to 'Breakfast at Tiffanys') that brings the audience right into one of Mary's daydreams - but this imaginative opening is not sustained through the rest of the film.
Initially it's a fairly simple set-up: the hyper-dramatic Mary, dictating that she should only be called Lola, has to leave her beloved New York behind and find a new life in Dellwood. She makes a friend (Pill), riles an enemy (Fox, thoroughly vamping it up as the baddest of bad girls) and even finds someone to flirt with (Marienthal). As if that weren't enough, there's also Mary/Lola's ambition to be an actress and her adoration for the band Sidarthur, so add in an updated production of 'Pygmalion' and a farewell concert. Phew! It's all go in Teenage Drama Queen land.
There's plenty of over-the-top teen behaviour - and mascara use - but the whole experience feels a hell of a lot longer than 97 minutes. Only worth watching for Mary/Lola's fabulous outfits.