John Byrne recaps Sunday's seventh episode of The Traitors Ireland, with accusations flying in all directions as the day takes a few dramatic twists before culminating in a tense Round Table vote. ***Spoilers galore***
My head is still spinning after last Tuesday's episode. Katelyn’s gone, Paudie’s on his own in traitor land – and then he invites his (secret) son Andrew to join him.
Yeah! The Andrew who was nearly banished at the last Round Table!
What is Paudie thinking? Is he thinking at all?
And don’t get me started on Nick, who’s clearly lost the run of himself. Ben’s almost as bad.
You couldn’t make it up!
Anyway, here we go . . .
My Old Man's a Traitor!
In fairness, when Andrew turns up to meet the traitor, he laughs when Paudie reveals his identity and they embrace – as father and son should.
But there’s a game to be played here.
"I had my suspicions," Andrew told Paudie. "I knew it was either you or Patrick."
Paudie admitted to the camera: "I don’t know how this has come about – but it’s exactly what I wanted to happen."
Watch: The moment Andrew finds out his dad, Paudie, is a Traitor
So, did Andrew agree to join the da as a traitor or get murdered?
"I’m all in," he said, and Paudie handed him a cloak. "Game on!" they both agreed.
Now, who was going to get murdered in Andrew’s place?
In the conclave, Siobhan McSweeney adds a twist. "I would like you to pick four names that will go on Death Row," she tells them. "That choice is yours. Goodnight!"
Who will those four faithful be?
Breakfast Blues
Cut to the following morning and breakfast begins with the arrival of Oyin and Faye. Oyin – you may recall – got it spot-on about the traitors in their midst.
Naturally, they wonder who the new traitor might be. Patrick’s name is mentioned, but Oyin says: "I think it’s Paudie!" Well, yes and no.
"First breakfast as a traitor," Andrew tells the camera. "The way I’m still thinking in my head is that I’m a faithful – and once I convince myself of that I’ll convince others too."
But he’s finding the shift "really difficult".
The debate continues. Nick – who hasn’t arrived yet – gets a mention. Uncomplimentary.
"I feel that now people are starting to think that I could be a traitor," he admits to the camera. "It will be pushed, from the traitors, that I am a traitor . . . That suspicion was always going to be raised."
Bed well and truly made, Nick!
Once Nick arrives, Andrew has it out with him about being targeted for banishment the previous night.
Watch: There are trust issues on The Traitors Ireland
"How can I trust you?" he asks. "I understand you can never trust me again and that’s fine," Nick says.
Ben arrives and promptly apologises for being party to Nick’s botched banishment ploy.
But that just digs a deeper hole for him – and Nick in particular.
Just. Stop.
Andrew lays in to him and Paudie joins in. Then Siobhan arrives. But there are four faithful missing . . .
"The traitors have struck back," she explains. "Patrick, Mark, Christine and Joanna have been placed on Death Row. If you think that sounds ominous, well . . . it is."
Siobhan outlines what’s ahead. "On this mission, you will be tracking the four unfortunates. So, enjoy your breakfast. I know four people who aren’t."
Nick Knack Paudie Whack
After breakfast, Paudie and Nick are still at it. Nick’s smelling a rat. Or two.
"Andrew and Paudie, both at the exact same time, nearly, were doing the ripping up of the envelope and saying I’ve no credibility," he says.
"I just thought it was too convenient that the two of them had the same narrative and the same gesture."
Meanwhile, Ben is still trying to dig himself out of a hole he helped create.
As the old saying goes: 'If you’re explaining, you’re losing.’ And Amy’s not impressed.
"It has really changed my opinion of Ben and Nick, and how they handle themselves."
Maybe a mission can bring the gang back together? But first, a break . . .
Mission: Four-midable
There’s two grand up for grabs in this latest mission, which is to find the four faithful on Death Row.
The trick is to answer questions about the group correctly in order to gain a shield that can be given to either Christine, Joanna, Mark or Patrick.
"The other three will remain on Death Row," Siobhan explains. "And one of them will be murdered tonight."
They break into two teams and head off.
The team that includes Faye, Nick, Paudie, Wilkin and Andrew is the first to discover the location of the holding cell. So they get to choose who gets the shield.
Faye goes for Christine. Three others agree and only Nick is left. "I lifted my arm, reluctantly," Nick confesses. "Because I wanted to save Mark."
Christine’s obviously delighted. "I’m so happy," she says. And there’s another couple of grand in the kitty.
But what about Joanna, Mark and Patrick? "Sorry" doesn’t really cut it. But along with a certain 'f' word, it's the most overused on the show. Sorry.
Vanessa feels they’ve let Mark down. Will there be repercussions at the Round Table tonight?
Mark, on the other hand, reckons: "I’m in with the two traitors". The holding cell seems a little bit smaller after that. After all, one of them gets murdered tonight.
What Goes Around, Comes a Round Table
Back in the castle, Christine gets a rundown of the fun and games she missed at breakfast.
Then – surprise, surprise – Joanna, Mark and Patrick appear at Slane Castle. "Why do you look so sad?" they’re asked. "We’re on Death Row!" Duh!!!!!
"It was nice to see that everybody was glad to see us," Joanna says. "But . . . I know there is one or two people to kill me, so . . ."
Andrew and Paudie catch up and pointlessly debate whether or not Andrew should have been selected for traitor duty.
Then, it’s all down to the Round Table. Which should be fun.
But not for everyone.
First up, Joanna. She reckons "there was a traitor today between the three of us" referring to the Death Row lineup. Turning to Patrick, she says: "Obviously I think that it’s you."
"You always have an answer for everything," she adds.
Then Patrick turns on Andrew. "I will be voting in your direction."
Andrew in turn goes for Nick and Ben. "Ye lost my trust yesterday."
Ben then turns the table on Andrew and Nick then adds in Paudie. This is really kicking off!
Vanessa turns the focus back on Patrick, then Oyin says to Andrew: "If there was a blackmail last night, I feel it would’ve been you,"
Her reading of the game is incredible! Well, compared to the big mouths.
Siobhan calls a halt to the chat. Time to lay blame and name names.
And take another commercial break . . .
You Say 'Hell No!' And I’ll Say 'Goodbye'
First up Christine. "I’m sorry Patrick . . ."
Andrew wastes no time in adding in his vote for Patrick. Wilkin does likewise. 3-0 already!
Faye changes the tide. "I’m sorry," she says. "I just had to go with Andrew."
Vanessa admits that she’s "pretty confused" but goes for Andrew.
Ben thinks "You would’ve been a good person to blackmail" and votes for Andrew. 3-3.
Mark’s next. Points out that Andrew’s "a hot topic two tables in a row" and votes accordingly.
Oyin – predictably – also votes for Andrew. He’s two ahead of Patrick now. Looks ominous.
Joanna goes for Patrick, who then votes for Andrew, "because of the narrative you created on me – the wrong person".
Kellie gives Andrew a slight chance by voting for Patrick. Only one in it now.
It’s Paudie’s turn. "I’ve been avoiding scud missiles for I don’t know how long," he says. "It distracted me from Patrick, but that’s where I’m going." All square!
Amy says "I think it’s both of yiz!" But who gets her vote? "I went for yourself, Patrick."
Finally, it’s Nick. No surprise there as he votes for Andrew.
"So, "Siobhan says, "we have a tie." What happens now?
"The tied players will plead their case, then the rest of you will vote again between those two until we have a majority."
Watch: So long Andrew!
It’s at times like this that you realise there’s only so much tension you can take in an hour of telly. I feel like I’ve a headache in my feet at this point.
Patrick goes first. "I just don’t think there’s anything . . . to point towards me being a traitor."
"I want you know that I’m a faithful," says Andrew. "I’ve been trying to get faith – I've been trying to get traitors out of this game." That verbal faux pas might finish him.
Joanna goes for Andrew after previously voting for Patrick. Kellie goes for Patrick. As does Paudie. Amy goes for Patrick, Nick for Andrew. No change.
Christine also sticks with Patrick. "I decided to change my vote to Andrew," says Wilkin. It’s 4-4 now.
Vanessa changes her vote and names Patrick. Ben remains in the Andy-out camp. Mark agrees.
He’s toast. It's adios Andrew and Oyin confirms it.
Addressing the group, Andrew says: "You’re all fabulous players. And fabulous people. So, genuinely, keep up with what you’re doing. And if you haven’t found your voice, find it – because your voice is very important.
"You’re on a roll," he adds, holding up an arm. "I’m a traitor."
Amid the general bedlam, a delighted Faye says: "We did it again!"
Paudie Pens to Make Amends
The joy is not shared by Paudie. "I felt very deflated for him," he says, reflecting on Andrew’s banishment. "I hated it – hated seeing him in that position."
"Three in a row," says Siobhan. "A hat-trick. Congratulations." But. There’s always a but.
"I’ll leave you with this," she says. "Mark, Joanna and Patrick – tonight, you are to remain in the perilous grip of the traitors on Death Row. And one of you will be murdered. Goodnight!"
Nick and Ben are back in frat party mode. "They were so excited," says an unimpressed Kellie, who also has words for Andrew.
"I was so taken aback because if he’s been a traitor since Day One and fooling me the whole time – I will never forgive that man.
"No one is off the table," she adds. "If Andrew can do that to me, anyone can do that to me. And I’m not letting myself be that manipulated anymore."
If only she knew the truth about Andrew.
Later, Paudie’s back on a lonely traitor perch in the conclave of one. He’s got to be out for revenge. But all three on Death Row voted for Andrew.
And he got a clear round.
"I’m astounded I’m still here," says Paudie. "100% shocked. . . But I’m delighted."
Paudie then makes his choice in silence. There’ll be one less chair required for breakfast in the morning.
The Traitors Ireland continues every Sunday at 9:30pm, Monday and Tuesday at 9:35pm on RTÉ One and RTÉ Player, followed directly by The Traitors Ireland: Uncloaked on RTÉ One, except on Tuesdays, when it’s on RTÉ2.
