John Byrne recaps the twisty second episode of Traitors Ireland that was filled with accusations, cock-ups and more corpses. ***Spoilers aplenty***
And then there were 21.
The second episode of The Traitors Ireland had the first faithful departed, the second mission, and a hell of a lot of accusation and speculation - and a potentially colossal cock-up or two.
First up, corn flakes and a kind-of corpse.
***Spoilers ahead!****
Dead and Breakfast
Andrew and Diane were first to arrive for breakfast. As the others turned up, they all expressed relief that they had survived, but were increasingly curious as to who had been murdered overnight.
"It's actually becoming real," said Vanessa. You betcha!
After all the hugs it boiled down to three possibilities: Mark, David or Michelle.
Michelle walked in, and then Mark. Dave was gone! The traitors had murdered him.
Rolling the camera back to the previous night, Dave arrived back at his room and the dreaded letter was there. "Oh my God!" he said. "That’s the end of the road for me.
"I’m gutted," he added. "I’m absolutely sick I am."
Watch: There's a shock at breakfast for The Traitors Ireland contestants
The one who had instantly been the life and soul of the group was gone. This was a ruthless game and the traitors were showing no mercy from the start.
"People are really, really shook," said traitor Katelyn. "It had the exact effect that I knew it would have," said a very happy looking fellow traitor, Eamon.
Paudie - the third traitor - played the innocent at breakfast. "It’s a strange decision," he said, lying through his teeth.
Traitors Ireland host Siobhán McSweeney then came in. Would she put smiles on people’s faces? Not a bit of it.
"If you think that’s shocking," she said, "I’ve got some very bad news for ya... He will not be the last. For, make no mistake, you are breaking bread with traitors.
"They are plotting your murder."
Michelle Not Shocked
If there was one thing this show thrived on, it was accusations. Step up, Michelle.
She was eyeing people up from second one, and now that someone had been murdered, she was in overdrive.
"I’m pretty honest," she insisted. "When I found out it was Dave I turned to Faye and told her to watch her back. ’He was popular and so are you. You could be next.’"
Meanwhile, Eamon made a bit of a boo-boo. While talking to fellow traitor Paudie in front of others about who the traitors might be - deflection much? - he asked: "Have you a name for tonight - I mean inside."
As Paudie put it: "I hope he hasn’t thrown the two of us under a bus... I just hope nobody heard it."
Meanwhile, Linda was on the ball. "I’m convinced, at this stage, that Katelyn is a traitor."
Mission Eile
The task was to find 10 out of 30 symbols which corresponded with old stones. Get them right and they had another €5,000 in the kitty.
But only if a gigantic dagger lit up, showing that all 10 symbols were matched correctly.
The catch was, the words were in Irish. Luckily, there was a schoolteacher at hand in Niall. And Diane spoke Irish daily. A few others had the classic cúpla focal. But it wasn’t easy.
To be honest, I hadn’t a clue what was going on here. Far too complicated for this couch potato.
Watch: Daddy who? Andrew slips up on The Traitors Ireland
With all the symbols in situ, the dagger didn’t light. They had to find the errant symbol. Panic and self-doubt crept in.
Meanwhile, Andrew called Paudie 'Daddy’. Uh-oh. "I think we might have gotten away with it," said Paudie. We shall see.
With time ticking by, chaos ensued. "There was nothing else we could do," said Niall.
Then, the dagger went up in flames and everyone went nuts. Five K in the bank.
They all chanted "Ni-all! Ni-all!" Let’s hope they don’t turn around and banish him at the next Round Table.
Banishing Point
On the way back to the castle, the talk was all about potential traitors.
Inside the castle, tea and coffee were poured and the conspiracy theories flowed. Names were mentioned - but who would get the boot?
With all 21 assembled at the Round Table, Siobhán announced that the pot was currently standing at €9,200.
Now it was down to the business of getting someone banished. As Siobhán explained, the person with the most votes would get the boot.
Diane was first to get accused of being a traitor. It was pointed out - not for the first time - that the previous night Dave had said that if he was murdered by the traitors, "It was Diane."
Traitor Eamon jumped on that. Others followed. Eamon then twisted the knife in her back a bit more.
I couldn’t watch. I couldn’t stop watching.
Wilkin was next to get accused. At least there would be a contest. Then Patrick brought up Nina’s name - and they went at each other. The tension! The clowns!
Watch: Have the contestants voted for the right person to go home?
Diane’s name came up again. Eamon - sitting beside her - got stuck in again.
Diane said, "I am a faithful!" She was clearly drowning in a sea of accusation.
Then Siobhán announced: "You’ve had your say, now I need your votes."
Christine got the banishment ball rolling by choosing Wilkin. In classic Traitors’ show tradition, her spelling of his name was incorrect.
Michelle went the same way. Then Andrew. Wilkin then nominated Diane. Then another two voted for Diane. Three votes each. The tide had turned and Diane was being swept away.
Mark picked Paudie, which should make the next traitors’ conclave a tad interesting.
But ultimately Diane was done and dusted. The vast majority had convinced themselves she was a traitor.
"How about that," Siobhán said after Diane revealed herself as a faithful. "You’ve banished one of your allies."
"They’re playing us like a fiddle," said Kelley.
As Vanessa burst into tears, she grew a large target on her back in some people’s eyes. The next banishment cock-up couldn’t be far away.
Michelle also shed a few tears. And plenty of others were bricking it in fear of being murdered that night.
Slay What You See
As the three traitors gathered later at night, Katelyn said: "What a day!" Paudie wondered: "Am I in trouble?" Eamon offered a tiny crumb. "A little bit," he said.
Eamon then said: "I have a plan."
Mark was the first one targeted. But Eamon was getting a liking for aiming at the likeable members of the group.
"Last night’s murder was perfect," he said. "They were all over the shop. We can do it again if we take out our little gaelgoir."
Not Niall!
Katelyn reckoned: "There are people who suspect him." What?
Eamon was full of it now. "It’s going to be like lighting a bonfire!"
Then Andrew’s name popped up and Paudie’s head went down.
Boiling it down to three names, Katelyn mentioned Mark and Niall. Eamon chipped in: "Faye could be another one."
"She’s fully expecting to go tonight," said Katelyn.
"Maybe," Eamon replied, "she should get what she wants."
Finally, they agreed on who would be the next faithful departed.
Breakfast would be served to one less body.
The Traitors Ireland continues every Sunday at 9:30pm, Monday and Tuesday at 9:35pm on RTÉ One and RTÉ Player, followed directly by The Traitors Ireland: Uncloaked.
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