Billie Eilish has revealed that her battle with depression during her adolescence made her fear that she was going "to have a breakdown and shave my head.'
Speaking to American Vogue, the recent multi-Grammy Award winner said that she particularly grappled with issues about body image in her early teens.
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For this issue, Vogue commissioned 3 unique covers—all starring @billieeilish—from 3 different photographers. Read the full profile: https://t.co/wLrDGAEcHq pic.twitter.com/BhcVCebVyT
"I just hated my body. I would have done anything to be in a different one," the 18-year-old said. "I really wanted to be a model, really bad, and I was chubby and short. I developed really early. I had boobs at nine. I got my period at 11. So my body was going faster than my brain."
She also said that at one point she felt so low, she considered taking her own life but her outlook began to change by June of last year.
"When people ask me what I’d say to somebody looking for advice on mental health, the only thing I can say is patience," Eilish said. "I had patience with myself. I didn’t take that last step. I waited. Things fade."
She also feared she would become a stereotype of a young artist and referenced Britney Spears' very public act of defiance when she shaved her head as paparazzi looked on in 2007.
"As a fan growing up, I was always like, 'What the f*** is wrong with them? All the scandals. The Britney moment. You grow up thinking they’re pretty and they’re skinny; why would they f*** it up," Eilish said.
"But the bigger I get, the more I’m like, 'Oh, my God, of course they had to do that.'
"In my dark place I’ve worried that I was going to become the stereotype that everybody thinks every young artist becomes, because how can they not?"
Eilish recalled experiencing her "lowest point" while on tour in Europe last year, saying: "I was worried I was going to have a breakdown and shave my head."
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