We;re delighted to present an extract from Stuff Happens, the new book from Emma Gleeson, published by Sandycove.
Life is messy, and sometimes so is your space. As a reformed hoarder turned professional declutterer, Emma Gleeson knows how easy it is to be overwhelmed by stuff. Stuff Happens! is her life-changing guide to getting a handle on your stuff and reclaiming your peace of mind.
Some decluttering choices are clear cut and others require mental gymnastics to reach a decision. This chapter deals with what I call the 'sticky items', which require a more complex level of inquiry than just asking ourselves, 'Do I like this?' and ‘Do I use it?’
Listen: Spring decluttering with Emma Gleeson, via Louise McSharry on RTÉ 2FM
Once upon a time, I was the queen of dreaming up justifications for keeping things. My scraps of paper and fabric were ‘useful’, the dress that never fitted quite right had been ‘expensive’, the ugly jumper was ‘a gift’ and the giant bag of teddies was ‘sentimental’. I really have been there. What I’ve also found is that the longer something has been in the house, the more you feel inclined to keep it. We need to explore what is blocking us from making concrete decisions about these sticky items and understand the emotions at play under the surface of our indecision.
Expensive items
This is a refrain I hear time and time again from clients, friends and family, so let’s use an example to break it down. You have a juice-maker in the shed. It is an old model, difficult to clean and possibly broken. You no longer make juice and have no plans to return to your liquid lunches. Every time you go to clear out the shed, the juicer remains, because ‘it was expensive’ and is ‘high quality’. This is what is known as a sunk cost. The money is spent, you will never get it back, and having the offending item sitting there staring at you will not change that. This excuse is about shame. We feel we have done something wrong by spending our precious income on an item we don’t use. We cannot face admitting this mistake and so never make a definite decision.
up justifications for keeping things.'
I tripped up in this way many times, for example with a coat I owned for years that had cost me more than I would like to say. It was well cut, in nice fabric and from a good label. Although it never looked right on me, I could not get rid of it. I even wore it to a wedding once, simply to justify my keeping it. In the photos I look uncomfortable, as if I’m trying to hide in the stupid coat. I recently, finally, passed it on to a friend who I know will love it. I had a similar experience with a pair of black Converse runners which I’d kept from my waitressing days. I no longer wanted to wear them, but they were good leather and my justification for their place in my wardrobe was that I would someday need them for hillwalking (who goes hiking in Converse?) or some sort of fantasy DIY project. I finally brought them to a clothes swap a few months ago, and feel the lighter for it. Sometimes it takes time for the grip of certain possessions to loosen. Like an annoying house guest who outstays their welcome, one day you will come to your senses and ask them to leave.
Try using this process to get rid of expensive items you no longer need:
1. Be brutally honest and ask yourself if you are ever going to use it again or if you are going to change your lifestyle so that it becomes useful.
2. If the answer is no, then please forgive yourself for spending the money. It’s okay: it happens to the best of us.
3. Pass the unused item on responsibly.
4. Use this as an opportunity to commit to making wiser purchases in the future.
Stuff Happen! by Emma Gleeson is published by Sandycove and is available online now.
