Leprechauns to bail out Government

Thursday 01 April 2010 10.38
Pot O' Gold - Set to be added to State coffers
Pot O' Gold - Set to be added to State coffers

The Leprechaun community is to give its pots of gold to the Government to help cover the cost of recapitalising the banks.

The financial crisis is expected to cost billions so Taoiseach Brian Cowen and Minister for Finance Brian Lenihan have been looking for ways to ease the burden on taxpayers.

The two men travelled to the ends of the rainbow to persuade Leprechaun leaders to invest in the country's future.

In return for donating the pots of gold to the State coffers, Leprechaun leaders have asked for land in west Clare to create their own reserve.

The final deal was brokered on St Patrick's Day when US President Barack Obama invited Leprechaun leaders to the White House for talks.

UN Leprechaun Ambassador Bono, who is partial to a good cause, was also present at the talks, where he called for the rights of Leprechauns to be fully recognised by the State.

There was once a larger Leprechaun population in Ireland but they were culled by Oliver Cromwell in the 1640s.

Top of the morning to ya

Leprechaun leader Hairy Twinkletoes O'Shaughnessy said: 'Top of the morning to ya. Bejaysus and Begorrah. 'Tis a soft day afterall.'

Taoiseach Brian Cowen said he welcomed the deal and was grateful for the Leprechaun intervention in saving the country from financial meltdown.

Mr Cowen also said that the Government was discussing plans to introduce an extra bank holiday.

He said that the banks could do less damage to the economy if there were more holidays.