Seth MacFarlane, the legend behind Family Guy, Ted and The Cleaveland Show, tries his luck at making a 19th century Western spoof, but unfortunately viewers won't be saddling up for a good time.
Albert Stark (MacFarlane) is a down-and-out sheep farmer who's left inconsolable when his "big eyed" girlfriend Louise (Seyfried) breaks up with him for the local moustachioed extraordinaire (Harris). Just as Albert begins to drown his sorrows in the local saloon, in comes a beautiful but mysterious woman (Theron), who helps to mend his broken heart.
However, Albert’s new romance is quickly interrupted when badass bandit, Clinch Leatherwood (Neeson), heads to Old Stump for a showdown.
The gags feel silly and forced with the script relying heavily on unoriginal innuendos and cliché gestures to coax it along – think toilet jokes and cheap sex puns, and you’ll get the picture. Most of the memorable moments are featured in the trailer – dropping the giant block of ice; an angry bull appearing out of nowhere and random deaths at the County Fair.
The subplot involving Giovanni Ribisi's virgin Edward who is in a ‘committed’ relationship with prostitute Ruth (Silverman) wears thin after the first thirty minutes.
Theron brings a refreshing energy to the flick, while Seyfried’s character deserved more lines and airtime. Neil Patrick Harris steals the show with his comedic wit and catchy ‘Moustache Song’, while Neeson gives a worthwhile performance as the gun slinging Irish cowboy.
Albert’s ‘tripping’ scene involving talking and dancing sheep at a Native American campfire stands to be the highlight of the movie.
While A Million Ways doesn’t suck as much as MacFarlene’s Oscar hosting duties, the only awards it will be winning will be at the Razzies.